My Reply To A Grieving Mother

I initially wrote this as a reply to a letter I had read in the Springfield newspaper but my letter was not printed. I was hoping to say something to the poor woman that wrote this letter. She was upset at the time because of all the attention that WWII veteran’s were getting in the paper, while others never seem to be mentioned, or at least, not as much. I deeply sensed her pain and resentment, as well as her continued sorrow, as she related how she had lost her son in Vietnam. I cannot empathize, for I have never lost a son in a war, but I did serve in Vietnam, so I somewhat understand. This is what I wrote to her:

      While it would be justified and fair to try to give every veteran his or her due in the newspapers, someone inevitably would be missed, and it would be nearly impossible to acknowledge every deserving veteran. There is no doubt that your son was a brave and decorated soldier from what you stated in your letter and you have every right to be proud, but I can personally attest that there are many untold stories and many acts of heroism from all the wars that are never recognized by anyone, let alone the newspaper. This is not the newspaper’s fault, nor is it the fault of those who do get a headline.
After three months at Desert Storm, the soldiers came home to parades, bands playing, and cheering. This hit me unexpectedly hard and I was in tears. I came home to spitting, cursing, and signs of protest. I was very happy for those returning men and women, but also very distraught for the homecoming we Vietnam vets were subjected to. It was neither fair, nor deserving. It was simply a sign of the times we lived in.
I appreciated your letter and understand your frustration. Your son not being headlined does not take away from what he did, or his place in your heart or memory. And likewise, other soldiers being headlined does not take away from what he did.
Please know that there are many veterans that appreciate what your son did and many parents who feel the pain you have endured. Each year, more and more veterans are being recognized for their service and the title, “Vietnam Veteran” are not such a dirty words any more.
Every veteran may not be noted in the newspaper, but they are certainly noted by other veterans and their relatives. Please be at peace about this, and thanks again for your heartfelt letter.
– Randy Ark