A Marine's World–Or Just an Experiment?
by Peter Macdonald, Sgt. USMC
Life is so screwed up! Can you conceive going to Marine Boot Camp and learning how to Kill? Every phrase while in training has this word in it.
Dream of leaving Boot Camp and getting in a serious car accident that left you with a Traumatic Brain Injury and no memory of your life prior to the accident. You grow from an infant mentally to a 10 year old, when the unconceivable happens. The U.S. Gov makes a mistake and sends you back to active duty with the mind of a 10 year old.
Imagine spending 31 months on foreign soil learning as a child. Is it possible to slip through the cracks and learn life all over? Is it possible to live through the beatings from superiors because they have no idea your mind is really empty that you are not lazy. Is the word Kill so indented in your brain that when confronted by enemy situations it happens? Is life so that a Marine with mental problems can become a Sgt in charge of life or death situations. Every situation is conceivable to this Marine because he has no memory to judge reality by, even today.
Imagine coming back to "Round Eyed Country" U.S. and never remember being here before? Is it believable to think the U.S. Gov would drop a disabled U.S. Marine into society with no support?
Think of the difficulty someone that spent 31 months where killing is the norm is dropped in a civilized society? Are the people introduced as my family, really family or a Gov experiment. How does someone like this know whom to trust and not trust? Do people tell you the truth or are they just playing head games because they understand that you do not?
Imagine going to college with short and long term memory problems or where reading makes the pain in your head become deadly.
Can you imagine the embarrassment when people learn that you have a back injury from a Vietnam Conflict offensive. That is ok because you can not hear most of the comments of being a baby killer because you lost most of your hearing from being blown off a runway during another offensive.
How does a Marine judge meeting and marrying the perfect wife then having three great daughters? Is it luck, part of the experiment or what?
This Marine has now volunteered every day since returning to the "World" U.S. in '74 helping any and every one.
Is it conceivable to believe that the NH Gov would declare this 100% disabled U.S. Marine a Terrorist to stop his volunteer work? Is it possible for this Marine to accept as normal life situation being thrown in a jail and losing his freedom for six months? Is it possible for the NH government to violated the laws because this Marine is only in a Gov experiment? How possible is it for the Veterans Director of NH veteran's medical care to stop this 100% disabled Veterans medical for political self gain or as part of the experiment?
These are all facts happening in real life to a 100% disabled U.S. Marine. The only really constant every day memory is my first kill with a bayonet. I survived 8 convoys as an American Advisor deep into the jungles delivering surplus supplies to friendly camps.
Is NH and the Veterans Administration pushing me to suicide as a part of the experiment?
Reality is that many returning Veterans have many of these constant reality questions so am I different or not really here? I have violated no laws yet the State of New Hampshire and the Veterans Director have violated our Constitution to intentionally harm a U.S. Marine and not one or you care.
It is not me, my life is over.
Returning Veterans of today will be put through these same situations as long as the Citizens of the United States of America refuse to give a hand to returning Heroes. You, that have never been there have no idea the difficulty of returning Veterans to accept the reality of this safe place you all call home.
Peter Macdonald Sgt USMC Semper Fi
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